How to Make Friends in Your 20s

Making friends in your twenties can mean replacing a routine that disappeared, not fixing something wrong with you. If school, work, housing or the people around you keep changing, start with one recurring activity you can keep attending and one person you would like to see again. Build from the life you actually have.

You might be studying, working, looking for work, parenting, living with family or sharing a place with strangers. None of those situations is the required version of being in your twenties. The useful question is where you can find repeated contact without stretching your time or money too far.

If you are not at college

You do not need access to a campus to join an interest group. Look at public libraries, adult education providers, volunteer organisations and recreational clubs. Start with the activity, then check whether it is open to adults outside a university. Some campus events welcome the public; others require student membership. Read the actual joining rules.

Choose something where participation gives you a reason to interact. A beginner workshop, a practical volunteer task or a regular game group may be easier to enter than an unstructured room full of existing friends. Ask the organiser: “Is this suitable for someone coming alone for the first time? How does a new person join in?”

If you have just left college or training

Finishing a course can remove the ordinary moments that kept friendships going: lunch between classes, a shared journey, a familiar study space. Instead of trying to recreate that whole environment, identify what you miss. Is it seeing familiar faces, having something to do at weekends, or having a person to talk to after a difficult day?

Give old friendships a new format. You could suggest a regular call, a shared online activity or an occasional visit that fits both budgets. Ask what is realistic rather than assuming the old level of availability still exists. For the people you want to keep close at a distance, see maintaining an online friendship.

Build one local routine alongside those connections. That might be a weekly class near home, an evening volunteer shift or a group linked to an interest you already have. Local contact and old friendships serve different needs; neither has to replace the other.

Keep work from becoming your only social option

Colleagues can become friends, and it is fine to enjoy their company. But a social life that depends entirely on one workplace can become fragile when hours, teams or jobs change. Add a setting where you are not primarily someone’s colleague, manager or customer.

When you do invite a colleague, keep it easy to decline: “I’m going to the free exhibition after work on Thursday. You’re welcome to join if you fancy it.” Avoid putting pressure on someone whose job relationship makes refusal awkward. If you work from home, the remote-work guide offers ways to create contact outside the working day.

Make plans that fit a small budget

Be specific about what you can afford before a plan grows expensive. “I’d like to see you, but dinner out is beyond my budget this month. Would a walk or a free museum session work?” gives the other person a way to say yes. You do not need to explain your finances in detail.

Free entry is not the same as a free outing. Check transport, equipment, minimum purchases and whether booking is required. A group that expects frequent paid trips may not suit your current situation even if everyone seems nice. Finding a cheaper format is a practical adjustment, not a smaller ambition for friendship.

If you live with parents or other family

Living at home does not prevent you from building a social life, but hosting, privacy and transport may need planning. Suggest neutral places instead of waiting until you can invite someone over. Pick an activity reachable on your normal journey rather than a distant event you can attend only once.

You can explain the practical limit without apologising: “I can’t host at the moment, but I’d be up for meeting at the library workshop.” You also do not owe new acquaintances a story about why you live where you do. Share what feels relevant as you get to know them.

Turn a familiar face into an actual plan

After a comfortable conversation, use what you already share. “Are you coming next week? I was thinking of getting something to eat afterwards” is a natural extension of a group activity. If you exchange details, follow up with the specific idea rather than an empty greeting that asks the other person to invent the plan.

Try to leave space for mutual interest. Someone can be pleasant at an activity without wanting a closer friendship. Keep attending if you enjoy it, and get to know more than one person. The adult friendship guide helps distinguish meeting people, initiating and following through as separate steps.

You do not have to make nightlife your route

If parties are not your thing, choose a setting where conversation has a shared focus. A reading discussion, casual sport, volunteering or an online introduction can all be possibilities. If avoiding alcohol matters, check the actual event conditions rather than assuming a daytime activity is alcohol-free. Our guide to friendship without drinking explains the distinction.

ValuePair is another option for adults who prefer one introduction at a time. Choose friendship as your intention and begin with the same 14 questions, revealed one by one after both people answer. You can respond asynchronously. There is no guarantee of a suitable person in your area. Core matching, discovery and Chat stay free and ad-free, with optional Premium extras unlocked during beta. Start a ValuePair profile or read the FAQ.

Sources and editorial note

Pew Research Center’s transition-to-adulthood study examines varied education, financial and living arrangements among adults aged 18–34. That age range is broader than the twenties and does not show that any living arrangement causes a friendship problem. The APA friendship overview provides general context. Sources checked October 9, 2026. The practical plans above are suggestions to adapt, not milestones you should have reached.